In case you aren’t aware, it’s Football Season.
Football Season is a big deal to many people in the United States, but in Texas they take it to religious proportions. Because some fans of this blog are not from Texas, let me explain why those two words are capitalized. If you are from Texas you already know–go ahead and skip down to the top 20/bottom 10.
In Texas, probably more than anywhere else in the world, Football is Life. From September through January the entire world revolves around the local, college, and NFL football schedules. If you don’t believe it try scheduling something that doesn’t involve a touchdown or a field goal. If you want anyone to show up besides you, the foreign exchange students, and the three other people in town who think a tight end is something you achieve in yoga, you’d better schedule it for Thursday. That’s the only night of the week when you won’t conflict a game or a practice or a scrimmage.
I used to resist football. For the first 10 years that I knew my husband he spent every Friday night at various high school football games, doing field reports for the local radio station. Then he came home and stayed up until 1 am updating his website so that the rest of Texas (who was on Central time) could know the scores of the El Paso teams (who were on Mountain time). Then on Saturdays he’d spend the evening in the press booth for the UTEP football games, serving as spotter for the local broadcast of the UTEP games. We didn’t have an NFL team in El Paso, or I’m sure I wouldn’t have seen him on Sunday or Monday, either*. I thought his obsession was a little odd, until I compared notes with some of my friends and realized that everyone in Texas is that obsessed with football. Most people just watch the games–they don’t actively participate in them like Jamey did–but they are equally obsessed. * Now he’s managed to get himself in with Westwood One, who covers the Houston Texans, and he’s often called upon to do stats or help with production assistance for the game. But that’s ok–I can follow along just fine now.
I grew up with three sisters, and while my dad tried to make us all sports fans, we mostly ignored him while we fought over the bathroom and shopped him out of house and home. So when we lived in El Paso I coped with Football Season by getting season tickets to the Symphony and earning a Master’s degree. But when we moved to Houston I didn’t know anyone (and I already had my degree), and Jamey wasn’t as plugged in to the local and college football scenes–he merely watched the games on television. I quickly learned that if I was going to have any part in any conversation during football season in this part of the country I’d better learn something about the game. So I took advantage of him being home, and asked him to explain the rules and what was happening on the field. After many inane questions and more than one evening of stopping the television mid-play and having him explain what was happening to me again and again, I now feel that I have a working knowledge of how to speak Football. I’ve been a sports polyglot for three years now, and I feel almost like a native Texan. Almost–I still pronounce my g’s and my d’s, I don’t yet own a pair of cowboy boots, and I have a hard time saying (let along writing) “y’all.” But I can at least now converse with people for five months out of the year.
So now you understand why Football Season is a proper noun in Texas. And if you’re still reading, you can now enjoy this week’s top 20/bottom 10. Go Texans!
top 20
The Houston Texans opening game–way to show the Colts how to start a season!- actually understanding what’s going on on the field
- My late mother-in-law, Joan, who would have celebrated her 67th birthday this Tuesday. I was blessed to have known her, and not a day goes by when I don’t think about her and wish she were still with us. I’ll be drinking a Bellini in her honor.
- the word “triscadecaphobia“
- a clean car
- Stephen Colbert’s Been There: Won That: The Returnification of the American-Do Troopscape
- Almond Hershey’s Kisses
- Helen Mirren
- a new fall television season
- Autumn. I don’t get to really enjoy it in Houston where it’s still over 95 degrees during the day, but it’s nice to know it’s happening somewhere. (see bottom 10, item # 10)
- reaching out to others
- tolerance
- environmentalism
- payday
- apples and cheddar cheese
- The Employee Appreciation Picnic presented by the City of La Porte Special Events Committee. These types of picnics can be really un-fun but this one was actually really nice.
- Twitter
- test-driving the Honda CRZ
- David Sedaris
- Five Guys and Fries
bottom 10
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AP Photo/John Raoux
intolerance
- the Zoosk commercial with the really awkward dating scene. While we’re at it, the new Old Spice commercials. Bring back Old Spice Guy!
- The corner on my desk. I hit it almost every day with my thigh, and I have an enormous bruise there because of it.
- stunts for political gain
- KFC’s Double Down. Shudder.
- people who abuse privileges
- shady mortgage companies
- Stirrup pants (stirrup pants!) back in fashion. Seriously–did we learn nothing from the 80′s?
- horror flicks
- The fashion dilemma that happens when it’s fall in the fashion world but still summer for all practical purposes. You just can’t dress for sweater weather when it’s 95 degrees and 80 percent humidity–but linen skirts and sandals feel silly in mid-September.
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My youngest nephew Sevrin, who turns four on Wednesday. He’s getting a Darth Vader costume, a Bobofet Gun, and a Buzz Lightyear toy from his adoring aunts, which should give you a clue about the imaginative, fun-loving kid that he is.
lenn Beck. I’m sorry if any of my fans are his fans, but he drives me insane
sugarford
